The weekend has been very good.

Today I wanted to take Elizabeth to join a gym with me my car is still at the garage and so we have had to walk/rely on public transport but this has been good for Elizabeth as before going out I notice she is making excuses not to and is suffering a bit from Agoraphobia but after going out she is happier. At the care home I understand Elizabeth was taken out once a week – it would either be swimming/walking. Here at home Elizabeth is getting out in crowded conditions more often and without all that extra drugging and this is rebuilding her confidence. She has not needed any of the highly addictive Lorazepam and I have read this can increase some of the symptoms of dizziness.

Needless to say everyone is commenting on the fact she looks much better since coming home as she can get out more easily and we are not situated on a main road.

Elizabeth is not being deprived of the chemicals by me as a mother as the team would like to think however she has not needed all the other extra chemicals on top:

If this regime of drugging was to go on for much longer I am sure her physical health would have been affected. Already there seems to be a problem. On a hot sunny day Elizabeth is freezing cold – her hands are like ice. These drugs have I am sure affected her physically.

Clozapine 350mg – is a highly sedatory drug which is being plugged by a Dr MacCabe who gives a shocking presentation and audio “Start Low – Go Slow” and pushed by the Nat Psychosis Unit who offer £45 so I understand towards their experimentations.

Elizabeth has complained it gives her double vision and she suffers dizziness to the point she has to hold on to someone when walking out. That could also be confidence as well since she has not been out that much over the past years. Going out is essential for her independence and being stuck in can lead to Agoraphobia – signs of which I have seen since her return home.

Social Services care most about whether Elizabeth is taking the drug but they do not know the first thing about drugs themselves. This is why I have had to turn to experts who know the drugs inside out even better than GPs and psychiatrists themselves as these are experts who work on the drugs. If the team knew about this chemical they would not have deprived it for several days and I was told to get her back there to the care home “we are paying for that”. Actually it is the taxpayer who is paying and how much is the taxpayer paying as I would like to know this information. Well it is far cheaper for my daughter to be at home as I am asking for nothing. If the team were to provide anything, the very best thing they could provide is a bit of funding in the form of direct payments in order that Elizabeth could go out more often with people of her own age which could also benefit those studying for say nursing, psychology as they can learn from a case at first hand and see fully her family background whereas at present if they look in the files they are likely to see some very wrong things written about me for instance and you cannot erase anything written. The things written are not nice at all or true and you can only get a true picture when you spend time with a family and not even from the visits by the Home Treatment Team who report back to social services so I have seen in papers. THIS IS WHERE WE NEED OPEN DIALOGUE AND THIS IS WHERE THE SYSTEM IS FAILING. The system plays upon capacity and confidentiality but should be open and transparent especially where taxpayers money is concerned and include the family – Elizabeth was upset when told to choose between her Mum and Dad and a member of the team could not seem to understand that when I spoke to this person not long ago. This was why Elizabeth did not want to go back and also she wanted to come home after her discharge from CAmbian but a condition of her release by the Tribunal was that she was NOT allowed to come home – they constantly play on the fact I would stop the drugs or encourage her to stop taking them but this is without foundation at all as you can see the lengths I have gone to get this chemical Clozapine not being a doctor myself and having read about the dangers of stopping this – not that it is impossible but in order to do this you would need very very close medical supervision and support from doctors so to everyone who reads my blog THIS IS SOMETHING I WOULD NOT ATTEMPT MYSELF WITHOUT HELP FROM A QUALIFIED DOCTOR AND I HAVE TO SAY THOUGH THAT ELIZABETH IS VERY STRONG TO HAVE COPED WITHOUT THE DRUG FOR SEVERAL DAYS ON THEIR ACCOUNT.

Well things are working out brilliantly at home with Elizabeth and we are all getting on – friends come in during the week when I work and at weekends I try and take Elizabeth out to nice places.

Recently in Liverpool I was delighted to meet people who really wish to see change in the UK and I am delighted with my new contacts.

Everything is wrong when the law allows enforced drugging to someone who is complying with the drug and a law that allows professionals to use such powers against families instead of helping them.

Anyway I do not think I will be getting my car back tomorrow so we will have to walk everywhere again but you can walk across fields nearby which takes you to the gym and you can even walk to the town and I wish to take Elizabeth into the town today to buy her some things to go with her outfit as we are going to a very nice event next week.

I thank God for the honesty and knowledge I have gained from various Universities and this is where to go if you want the latest advice.

I now have an important letter to reply to and have been putting this off so I must now do this – the letter is regarding Elizabeth and I show her everything and I will most certainly mention the report by the consultant psychiatrist of many years experience with the new diagnosis of PTSD and recommendation of INTENSIVE TRAUMA THERAPY. The people who are ignoring this report are not doctors and even if doctors do not agree with the report they have failed to give scientific evidence of the diagnosis “paranoid schizophrenia treatment resistant” – this is just a label in my opinion when underneath it could be a physical problem that remains unaddressed. If there was proper tests before giving these harmful drugs then there would be a more accurate case in giving out these labels and treatment of life time of drugging however there is not and that is why things are not fair in the UK. In Liverpool there seems to be a lot of support for change – then there are the Professors who would also like to see change but it is mothers like myself who have sons and daughters affected who want something done urgently – there is no excuse to say these things take time – this is nonsense in my opinion – time is money and they have a duty to the taxpayer in my opinion.


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