Monthly Archives: December 2012

Here is the message from my daughter which I have by text sent to me on Monday 3rd December. This message puts in dispute that Elizabeth only wants supervised phone calls when in fact she has been contacting me unknown to the team.  Elizabeth also wrote that she would ask the Manager at Cambian to see if she could see me at Xmas.  I then got a reply from Cambian – an email saying that they understood that the time available and agreed by the TEAM that I could ring my daughter ie 6.00 pm on a Monday could be re-arranged to a more suitable supervised slot once a week.  I have not as yet responded.  I am too upset to respond to a team who have treated me like a criminal from the very beginning.   A team who do not care at all about other people’s feelings, a team who have gone out of their way to manipulate my daughter and got rid of her existing solicitors.  I have not even the strength right now to complain about them but how on earth did they ever win the title of Best Care Provider in the Private Sector with the likes of Roger Black at their award winning do. 


The psychiarist Dr A W clearly did not like me from the word go and even referred to my past behaviour – God knows what kind of things have been written behind my back by the Bethlem and team.  I have never even met this psychiatrist and now this psychiatrist has gone off on leave for maternity but she has clearly gone out of her way to try and interfere with my daughter’s choice in terms of family arrangements and has ruined Xmas for the family especially myself and my younger daughter and I will never never forget what this psychiatrist has done.  I know for a fact that the rest of the team go by what the so called professional doctor has to say and she was very pro the Maudsley and called it a world-wide leading renowned hospital.  It was far from this – it was a research hospital where in fact they experiment on the weakest and most vulnerable people making huge money out of the funding provided by major drugs companies – whilst there could be an innocent explanation, bearing in mind the cruel laws of this country that allow such abuse to go on in the name of profit for these major drugs companies who instead of paying for people to take part in their clinical trials do so at their hearts content with the likes of people like my daughter.  Once drugged up and messed about with high dosages of drugs they are like “putty in their hands” and Dr James MacCabe and Prof Taylor have a lot of answer for and so does the Consultant Psychiatrist who she was under.  The pharmacist sat there smugly smiling throughout meetings until I pulled her up.  I was told to sit back, relax and leave everything to the professionals but what did they do-  three more drugs were introduced and one given off label for diabetes Type II.  It would seem if you dare to speak out against their shocking so called “care” you get treated as a criminal and human rights go out the window.  It is a cruel world and we are supposed to live in a civilised country in the UK but I have not got a good word to say about the UK and its care for the mentally ill.  There is much abuse going on and nothing is done.  Here is an example of what is being done by the CQC in their letter to me of the 05th December.


The letter has the reference 4/4/12/54.   The signature is totally illegible.  All it says is Information & Advice Officer with a scrawl of a signature.  This is a Government funded organisation the CQC that are supposed to investigate complaints and it would appear have done nothing.  I am waiting to hear from them in regard to my complaint on why my daughter’s face was covered in bruises.  For all I know she could have been beaten up by members of staff.  Who knows what goes on behind closed doors.  Maybe she refused to take her drugs and that is what they did to her.  I have no proof at the end of the day.  The reason my daughter’s face was covered in bruises could be one of many.  Perhaps she upset another patient – there could be an innocent explanation but it certainly looks suspicious especially when the ward manager had to ask me when this occured and I was able to tell her on the exact date this happened because keeping a record of this through my blog is very beneficial.  I was quite frankly shocked at the extent of the bruising.  Another reason is perhaps my daughter did that to herself!  One thing is for sure having experienced the extremel cruelty of the staff of the Fitzmary II Ward who have a blog by a former patient dedicated to them – anything is possible.  Whilst visiting the ward the patients told me that they were not happy –  they said things like their human rights were being abused.  What have the CQC done about this?   The CQC are an organisation who are not interested if you turn to them and tell them your daughter or son is being abused.  They are not interested in individual cases at all but I pointed out to them that there were many on the ward complaining of their rights.  In fact I know someone in hospital at the moment complaining of their rights but the CQC could not care less and send out a letter with a scrawl of a signature you cannot read to cover their backs and pass the buck to organisations who are already inundated with complaints such as the PHSO who have shut down my case on several occasions.  The letter states as follows:


“I have received a copy of the letter summarising the outcome of the investigation into your complain, you can contact the Parliamentary and Health Service Ombudsman Office (PHSO) within the next 12 months saying why you are not satisfied. The Ombudsman can investigate complaints that the NHS (or NHS funded care) in England have failed to act properly or fairly or provided  a poor service.


The Mental Health Act also grants the Care Quality Commission (CQC to consider an investigation. 


The PHSO is the final abiter in any complaint matter and therefore the CQC cannot consider any request for investigation once the Ombudsman has either completed or declined an investigation into your complaints.

Both the CQC and PHSO have failed miserably to do anything for my daughter.  It is a complete and utter waste of time going to either of them and in my opinion they should both be shut down.  It is a waste of taxpayer’s money to fund organisations that allow abuse to continue under mental health care and get away with earning big salaries for doing nothing at all.


The only way you can get someone to listen to you is if you are prepared to pay thousands to take matters to court.  To think taxpayer’s money is being wasted in such a big way on the likes of these organisations is horrendous and then on one occasion they came back to me that the care was “satisfactory” – this was an occasion where two firms of solicitors had outrightly said they were negligent at Enfield and yet the PHSO came back with the words “satisfactory”.  This was when my daughter went missing – I have all the files in this case and this points to negligence yet still they try and defend the care by saying the words “satisfactory” – it is only when a programme like Panorama gets hold of a particulare case of abuse that they do their job from what I see. 


It was truly shocking what happened to my daughter at that time and I was told by a nurse “no harm done” but I believe the opposite.I was ready to take them to court and this has been one of many shocking incidents that have happened to her over the past years leading to her decline some of which occurred on the wards themselves.


Now of course the team are desperate to get rid of me in any way they can because I have been outspoken and for no other reason.  They simply have no other grounds and I know will go out of their way to try and reason as to why it is not beneficial for my daughter to see me but in fact they are protecting their own backs.    I realise that they may try all sorts of tricks such as say that I myself am mentally unstable myself and that it is being done for my daughter’s safety –  How can this be?  I work full time – I was up until recently training to be a police officer –  I most certainly am not mentally unstable but I certainly would question the stability of some of the psychiatrists involved –  I question how they are desperately trying to defend their jobs in light of the increasing amount of professionals who are willing to honestly speak out and state that the drugs are not the answer and that cases should be looked upon individually In addition they cannot accuse me of trying to take her off the chemicals as I am not a doctor and she would need professional help in order to do this however it is not impossible and can be done in the right environment but in this uncaring country there is nothing and patients end up feeling in a hopeless situation and no longer caring what happens to them.   If my daughter had had the drug free period of assessment I would have been ready to accept the diagnosis however I know for a fact you cannot take someone off 150mg off Seroquel in just 2 weeks and not expect some kind of adverse reaction and then of course that is how they justifiy the sanctions they impose and these very sanctions are preventing me from seeing my daughter at Xmas.  I have asked time and time again for their reasons but they say nothing. 

You do not know how bitter I feel about this.  I am happy to go out of my way now to try and get the much needed funding to see groups like Soteria set up that give kinder care and consideration to the mentally ill.  There is not one single place int the UK set up and that is apalling.  In America there are centres such as Earth House – why not here?  Why could not one place be set up as a pilot scheme to see how it works.  It certainly works in Finland in a place called Tornio where I desperately tried to contact people to see if there was any way I could send my daughter over there to have decent care. 

As I have said before I am trying to raise the money.  I have approached two London football clubs so far- Chelsea  and Arsenal.  Hope to contact West Ham and Spurs to to see if I can get players’ signatures on tee-shirts which I am prepared to pay for to auction on Ebay in one big auction to see if I can raise the money for one if not all of three centres called Soteria, Chy Sawel and Root and Branch Project to be set up to provide humane care for my daughter and many people like her trapped in a never ending prison environment (some of whom have no voice and no family to speak up for them) they never get better because the only cure is drug pushing and that does not cure someone who for instance is a rape or abuse victim and only provides profit for the pharmaceuticals who in my opinion should be doing something to help the many “treatment resistant” patients by getting them reduced gradually and off these harmful drugs.  The fact they label someone as being treatment resistant says it all – it means they have failed – failed to treat someone effectively, failed to address the underlying reasons for the decline in their mental health and have done so by the easy route by pushing drugs and nothng else which is clearly not the answer.   It is also failure that a so called civilised country such as the UK do nothing to stop the abuse going on right now and see the only cure as drugs which of course bring huge profits to the pharmaceutical industry which in turn have close association with the Government.  With all the money the Government waste why could they not at least try such a scheme based on the care available in Finland.

I wish I did not live in this cruel country.  I so much want to leave and take Elizabeth with me to anywhere in the world where she can have the right kind of care.  A care that is humane and kind and addressed individual needs.




I received several text messages on Monday from Elizabeth.  She told me she was spending Xmas with her Dad and he apparently has bought a new cat.  I then asked did she not want to come home to see the cat that I bought her and to see myself and her sister to which she responded that she would ask.  She also wrote about the fact she was reading the Bible and I think she was excited about Xmas. 

 It is a long time since Elizabeth has been home and when I could see the shocking Bethlem hospital were not doing the promised drug free assessment and the Section 2 had come to an end I did try to get her out of there.  I found out when the Tribunal was and got time off from work but the solicitor recommended by the hospital said “do you really want to go through with this.  Elizabeth was unhappy about meetings etc and backed down and it was a complete waste of time.  Unfortunately there was her chance gone – her chance to get off the section and at a time when she was not unstable and just on the Olanzapine.  I still thought that the social worker who was very good at the Bethlem could have got her into somewhere good in a better area than where we live as he had discussed with me about where she could first go into Rehab.  Bearing in mind some events that happened prior to admission I was keen that she did not end up on the wards of Enfield Mental Health once again.  I wanted her to make a fresh start really so that she could hopefully get on with her life and be happy and there were too many bad memories locally.  Suddenly this social worker went off sick unfortunately – he was about the only member of staff there I truly trusted and the only social worker I have come across under the mental health who was good.  Anyway the next thing was they wanted to get rid of me as nearest relative and actually drew up court papers to this effect leaving me with no chance to get a solicitor because I did not agree with the Section 3 at all.  The fact that things were not done properly led to sanctions being taken against Elizabeth as you simply cannot come off 150mg of Seroquel over 2 weeks it was the consultant psychiatrist’s fault in my opinion.  In addition, mixing a drug with another can cause someone to become unstable and this is what happened and she was so disorientated that the next thing she was put on a drug with the initials M (metformine) and then Clozapine unknown to her.  So, before the Section 3 I was suggesting she remained first of all as a voluntary patient until the social worker found decent rehab care as I did not feel the area where I livewas the best thing for Elizabeth at the time because of recent serious incidents and the fact that the scheme certainly would not have been a place to return to that would be safe for Elizabeth.  However, when I saw what this hospital (Bethlem) did and the way I got bullied, I did not want for the Section 3 to go ahead and felt that this team could not be trusted at all in the way that they behaved .  I desperately wrote directly to the Judge herself to explain my situation but was worried about being replaced as the Nearest Relative as I was the one who did most of the visiting and had researched all these chemicals plus taken expert advice –  I knew they wanted desperately to replace me with someone who would just go along with everything without any conflict ie., her father.   I was also seriously considering in desperation and despair having Elizabeth home especially after I saw what they did with all those drugs in such a deceitful and despicable manner but by this time she would have needed a nurse to care for her as she could hardly walk once put on the Clozapine and was in a bad way. Still home would havge been better than the shocking Bethlem. 

Anyway, getting back to the messages – one said “I pray I will see you at Xmas, Mum”.  (Well, the letter from the consultant psychiatrist of Cambian clearly said escorted leave only and that she is too unstable to stay over Xmas).  I do not believe these comments at all. 


The next message from Elizabeth read that she would ask about Xmas leave and I thought to myself – that is a waste of time judging by the letter I received shortly before.  After she had asked, I got another email but from the Manager of Cambian.  The Manager wanted to speak to me but whilst at work it is difficult and the message came through her receptionist.  I later responded stating it would be best to correspond in writing as I was in an open plan office and could not speak.  When I got home from work I wrote to her and asked some questions which I am still waiting for the answers to.  The message was about the supervised phone calls once a week that I am allowed.  I think she wanted to alter the time of this phone call I stated that 6 pm  was not good as I travel home from work then.   I have not been phoning at all because I do not feel comfortable having supervised phone calls and besides Elizabeth has been texting me even though the team do not seem to want me to have any contact with her other than supervised/escorted leave.

After I received that last letter about the time of the phone call  I immediately thought I must act and do something because more than ever  I would like Soteria, Chy Sawel and Root and Branch project set up and the Goverment does not care less so again I thought of my auction which I propose to do to raise money for these projects.  I have thought of collectible items and am waiting to hear from various sources if they can help me.  Of course I do not mind paying for some of the things but things like autographs are collectible items and I read that Ebay say these sort of things do well in an auction.      

I do not know yet whether I will get the signatures I need but it is worth a try.

Last of all today I got another phone call and this was when at work.  I will report later on this as I do not know what this is all about yet.

Despite the ban on me phoning Elizabeth she has been in touch with me although the messages have been very brief and today I got a couple of messages that just said the word “OK”.  I wanted to phone her and speak to her but know that this would not be allowed by the team of Cambian Four Star Wards.  I did not know what she meant by “OK” so I wrote back briefly by text. 

I do not know what is going on because noone has telephoned me or written.  I am finding that at Enfield they say they do not know what is going on at Cambian and vice versa yet I am sure they must all be in touch and ought to know what is going on.  This reminds me of the care in the community where the team at the mental health housing were not informed what was going on by social services so it appeared. 


I am always very interested to hear what a growing number of specialists think and I especially admire people like Dr Ann Blake Tracy and Professor Healy amongst others.  The above links  are connected to Professor Healy and I would like to see him involved in my daughter’s case as you cannot dismiss the honesty of his comments or the wonderful book Prozac Panacea Pandora.  It is people like Professor Healy who give me hope.

I was pleased to get those messages from Elizabeth today and I have just heard from her sister that she telephoned the other day but the phone was not working and she had to go through the office.  I believe that Elizabeth is being brought down to this area but nothing has been said to me and so I doubt any visit will be made home and for the first time ever Xmas will be not the same at all. 

I cannot see any court cases happening before Xmas either.


Many people who know me personally have commented on how nasty the whole situation is.  The reason I want to make a stand is because I know of other people in the same situation or similar.  Some families have been torn apart because of this kind of situation.

Today I have been out shopping.  I have been doing some cooking as I have some guests from Italy.  I was meant to visit someone at the Bethlem Hospital but feel so drained and tired.  The whole situation is definitely affecting my health but my job keeps my mind off things.  I try not to think too much about this awful situation as there is nothing I can do right now.


During the past week I have had no phone call or response from either Cambian or Enfield Mental Health.   Elizabeth’s sister has not been able to get through on the phone at all.  It is the weekend and I have been trying to think what to do as I most probably will not be seeing my daughter for the first ever time at Xmas.  I object to having an escorted visit when  her father has had an unescorted visit and I do not know what is going on but then noone bothers to communicate with you. 


Despite feeling tired and drained I went up to the local town today to try and think what to get Elizabeth and bearing in mind I think she may be kept in  hospital I was planning to get some things delivered.  Things such as the wonderful food I have seen in Whole Foods in Kensington near where I work and Marks & Spencers do nice food and clothes.  I am thinking of placing some orders. 


I thought today of  having some photographs made into a calendar and this is costing me a lot as I am an honest person and it would be against copyright if I were to just take an album I had done and do this cheaply myself at a shop like Boots.  However, it is costing me hundreds.  It will be nice as at least my daughter will have something to remember – a day when she was very happy when I took her to have hair and makeup done followed by a photography session and of course she was in  hospital at the time locally. 


I had planned to go to the main shopping areas of London to try and find something collectible but the only chance I have working full time is after work which is late,  but have been too tired this week – maybe next week as I am still keen to do my auction and I think that something signed by a celebrity would be a good thing but I do not know any to ask.  I may ask the local football teams are something like this would be very collectible but I have no idea whether this request will be turned down.  I will keep trying in any case but I think I need something more to auction than what I currently have especially if I am asking for a huge donation – it is only fair that I try at least to get something else.


I have  missed my group meeting today because I had someone turn up to visit me.  The meetings always make me feel better.  I am totally inspired by some of the former patients who are determined to campaign for a better system in mental health.  


If only we had something available like in Finland in a place called Tornio.  I have already written to see if they would take Elizabeth as she constantly asks to go to Finland having spend several months there – these were happy and drug free times. Elizabeth never took drugs herself in the first place – the only drug pushing here has been from the team.

If only Soteria was set up over here and considering what waste of money is going on under this Government with loans to foreign countries being unpaid etc and wars where money is no object then it is a disgrace that this Government is not doing more to improve things in terms of mental health care.  In fact as I see it they do NOTHING.  Only Ed Milliband speaks up but- when is there going to be some action. 

I would like to display such a messageby laser beam onto a prominent building such as the Department of Health – if only!  This would get me attention and to think that Paul Burstow replied in a sympathetic way however he has done nothing to help – I want more than this now and I am getting impatient with them all – all of this is not helping my daughter and she needs somewhere to go where there is such a thing as humane healthcare and there is none from what I see.   I do not see the pushing of mind altering LSD like drugs at someone like my daughter who has multiple diagnoses as the answer – it is no wonder she is classed as being treatment resistant.  In cases such as these there should be a new approach and that approach can only be provided under groups like Soteria, Chy Sawel and Root and Branch Project.  I desperately need these set up as there should not be a care in place that is like a dictatorship and controlling every little thing and breaking up familiies such as at present just like a religious cult.  This is supposed to be a civilised country but I see that the UK is not civilised at all in how they care for the weak and vulnerable especially under mental health care. I am thinking seriously now like I did at the shocking prison environment of the Maudsley that she would be better of at home with a nurse living in to help.  I do not think though that the area is very good as it is London and noisy and stressful.  I hoped for so much when I found out about the holistic care under Welsh law but I do not think that anyone in the team is bothered about Elizabeth’s long term health.   The way I am being treated right now is terrible and I am being excluded from everything.  Still, I have no regrets but I understand that it is precisely because of the way I am being treated that this is why so many more unhappy parents and carers are too afraid to do this.     What I am doing is not only for my daughter but for everyone who does not have a voice right now and trapped in this shocking inhumane system.  Some have no parents or anyone who cares yet they are being held like prisoners on a never ending sentences.  A prisoner is treated better than a mental health patient who is completely stripped of their human rights and the law is an absolute disgrace in the UK.  The law is such that it is failing to protect the weakest and most vulnerable people in society and no-one seems to care about this – only those who have knowledge, who have been affected in some way either themselves or through having a family member who has had shocking care like my daughter.  The law needs to be changed that is for sure and so does the care in order to give choice to patients.  If a patient is happy being on the drugs then that is fine but there still n eeds to be the choice.

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