I have previously said that I am only allowed supervised phone calls and escorted leave and the Manager at Cambian says that the supervised phone calls are at my daughter’s request and will continue until further notice.

It is Xmas next week and normally I would have shared having Elizabeth between myself and the rest of the family.  There were never any arguments above this at all.  However this year is unique as I am not allowed to have my daughter – apparently she is supposed to be too ill but then what are the top people at Cambian and Enfield thinking of.   If someone is ill it is beneficial to be home amongst the family.  Both Cambian and Enfield Mental Health have shown an abnormal way of thinking however I think a lot of this had to do with the psychiatrist Dr A W who went off on maternity leave.  Perhaps now she will know how it feels to be a mother as her treatment of me has been absolutely apalling and not in line with the way the rest of the family are treated.  She has used her powers against me with the agreement of Enfield Mental Health no doubt and the rest of the team have no choice but to go along with this and this is where more investigation needs to be done at top level.  It is the people at the top who spoil everything and give everyone a bad name but I know only too well that this decision is coming from the top and I decided to make it as nice an occasion as possible for Elizabeth. 

I rushed out in the morning to do shopping and then cooked food for a buffet and did hot and cold food.  I enjoy doing this sort of thing as it is nice to see people.  Trouble is the pace of life around here in London makes it difficult and the fact I work full time.  So, I went to pick up the gift I got for Elizabeth in the town –  a while back I had photos taken of her and she looked very nice and I made some of these photos into a calendar.  I gave a cheque to Cambian so that they could take her out shopping which is something that I would have done and miss doing myself.

There was huge traffic on the roads and Elizbeth did not arrive until gone 2pm by which time most of my friends had arrived.  These are people that have known Elizabeth for a very long time, like when she was a little girl.  I noticed that Elizabeth had brought some things with her including a child’s toy car.  These mind altering drugs have the effect of making someone go back to childhood.  I did not comment because I have also seen that Elizabeth will buy babyish toys and nothing like what she would at once time have bought.  I did too much food and her younger sister put on some up to date music.  The staff were very very nice who bought her.  I do not have a problem with the nursing staff except of course some at the Bethlem who was very unprofessional in the way that they behaved.  These nurses clearly looked surprised and Elizabeth seemed to enjoy herself and was very pleased to see her pet kitten and has grown a lot.  All too soon the day had ended and at around 5 pm the nurses had to say it was time to leave but I could see the expression which was one of sympathy but what can you do when you have to deal with the heartless people at the very top. 

I am going to ask this same question to Mr Jeremy Hunt.  In fact they can all get a letter and a piece of my mind as I have listened to Mr Clegg – it is about time he listens to me and the others too.

I cannot believe I will not see Elizabeth for the first time ever on Xmas Day.  Xmas Day is on a Tuesday and this is a day I am not allowed to ring. 

People who have known me a long time and my daughters were very shocked at the way I have been treated.

I am not looking forward to Xmas Day without Elizabeth this year.




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