I had called in to Harrods in the hope they could provide me with something collectible to auction with regard to the alternative care centres that I would like to see set up in the UK to provide decent humane care not only for my daughter but for many others.  Many people are in despair with the current care available and acute wards are not good places to recover – they should only be used short term at the very least not for periods of up to 2 years or more.  It is no wonder patients do not get better and also to make it easier for the staff this is why they drug the patients up with chemicals and raise the dosage on admission.  The atmosphere can be tense and volatile and can be very disturbing for someone who is extremely vulnerable.  There are members of staff who are dismissive towards patients and sit in their office ignoring a patient who is knocking at the window for attention.  I do not think these wards are safe either especially if they are mixed wards.

Anyway, Harrods were helpful and I ended up doing some Xmas shopping there as well and then just down the road at the Ecuadorian Embassay there were huge crowds gathering and international press lined the road in expectation.  Mulled wine was being served and demonstrations were chanting in support.  I was not standing in the best location to see Julian Assange but he spoke loudly and clearly and the message of his speech was given with clarity and was most interesting to hear.  I listened to some of the conversation in the crowd – six months he has sought refuge at the Ecuadorian Embassy – he spoke of the importance of freedom of speaking out against injustice and mentioned specific cases.  I could not agree more that there is much injustice in the world and the press do not report things honestly at times. I admire someone who goes to lengths to fight for justice and reveals the truth about what is going on in the world.     Well, I can identify with that and I wanted to present to him a copy of my leaflet to show that there are many people under a life sentence with the shocking mental health care currently available and that does not just apply to the UK either.    What do you get when you speak out –  you get banned!  You get labelled and comments are written about you behind your back which I have seen in previous files.  I dread to think what the latest files contain.  What is even worse in my daughter’s case is that these drugs are harmful to her long term health and I would like these drugs to be reduced in a proper and decent manner.   I want a proper assessment done by Dr Walsh and the reduction done just like Dr Ann Blake Tracy instructs on her CD.  I am not expecting her to come off the drugs completely however nothing has been done properly –  I cannot accept a diagnosis when promised a drug free period of assessment and the reduction was 150mg off Seroquel then a mixture of Olanzapine introduced.  This whole hospital the Bethlem Royal Hospital has done things in a very deceitful manner and they get money from it.  Experimentation on weak and vulnerable patients and sanctions imposed when their reductions cause adverse behaviour – then of course it is law that they can force someone to take the drugs.  They should pay for people to be human guinea pigs and not use vulnerable patients in such a way.    I am waiting for an explanation as to why my daughter’s face was covered in bruises in that hospital.  It is not good enough to say “I am happy with that” or “what day did that occur”.  The latter I could answer exactly as I wrote about it on my blog and as for the lead nurse saying I am happy well I as a mother am far from happy.  There could have been an innocent explanation –  however at a hospital where they drug patients up like zombies to their hearts content I as the nearest relative that they tried to dismiss need answers to these questions.  I do not expect to know everything but it is ridiculous the way they try to cover up and all stick together and then they try to make out that I am aggressive and nasty.  What chance could I have against such a big team who copy in so many people in so many roles to my emails.  I am still waiting for a reply from Gus Heafield (CEO) to my recent email.   The only time you can get to speak to these people who hide behind their desks is if you go to the Annual General Meeting and this is worth going to.  Otherwise it is impossible to get to speak to any of these people.  I would personally like to speak to Dr James MacCabe and Professor Taylor about the shocking research papers I have seen.  The consultant psychiatrist said my daughter was in good hands and that I should sit back and let them get on with the care.  This is laughable.  I told him that I was not the type to sit back and do nothing and that I had done extensive research and had been in touch with experts.

Anyway, on Saturday my daughter is coming home – I am going to make it a pleasant occasion.  I will not be seeing her for the first time ever at Xmas.  I have not seen her for while either.  She is being brought down by two members of staff from Cambian and she has already been brought down to see her grandparents on a separate occasion.  It is a while since I have seen her as it is too far for me to go down at weekends as I work full time as well plus I have strict restrictions on how long I can see her and it has always been with a member of staff standing over and listening to every word, no doubt with orders to report back to the consultant psychiatrist who is probably looking for a reason to ban me altogether from contact.  When I ask what the reason is I never get a proper answer.

I have a missed call in my phone from my daughter recently but mainly I have text messages that she misses me, misses her cat, is looking forward to coming home – I had one that she prayed she would be allowed to see me over Xmas.  If someone is so ill they cannot come and stay because of this then why on earth bring her down and take her back in just one day – this is not fair treatment.  However Cambian have said she requests supervised calls for instance.   If my daughter has said these things, she has said them when she is drugged up to her neck on Clozapine which is notorious for sedation and can enhance confusion in patients. 

I can only think that they do not want me to see how she is when she has taken this drug along with the Metformine which is not being given as it is supposed to be given but off label for weight loss which Dr Ann Blake Tracy has told me – most likely being given to counteract diabetes.

If someone is treatment resistant then it means they have failed and if the care has failed then the least the drugs companies should do is to chip in and provide the likes of my daughter with a choice but there is no choice in the UK – whereas there are some places like Earth House in the States for alternative care and in Finland in Tornio where they have unique care.  I would love to send my daughter to these places – if only.  The care in the UK reminds me of the pushing of drugs given to Michael Jackson.  However, this is under the NHS and this does not make sense when they are short of money and yet waste it on all these drugs that do not even work and then it is a drain on resources when a patient ends up suffering from a serious condition as a result of these chemicals.  Cambian is continuing with all that and has not attempted to make the slightest bit of a reduction.  It would seem that all these experts do not have a clue how to do a reduction properly and at the Maudsley I made sure that I brought in all the information I could because I am a Gold Member of the International Drug Awareness Coalition governed by Dr Ann Blake Tracy who  has given me such wonderful advice and thanks to her I have been able to pass this advice on to other professionals although at the Bethlem this was not appreciated at all.     However, there is a new psychiatrist who has replaced one who clearly did not like me at Cambian and I have yet to see if things will improve.  He at least seemed to listen to me and did not turn around and say no when I mentioned about Dr Walsh and his assessment but it is too early to say for sure yet.  He even referred to “if I was paying for that – he could not see any problem or words to that effect”  – Lets see in the New Year what will happen and I hope and pray this new psychiatrist will be kinder and listen to my daughter and work with myself as Nearest Relative.  He did say that he was keen to liaise with family whereas the other one was dismissive and disliked me from the beginning. 


1 comment
  1. LG said:

    I hope that things work out well with the new psychiatrist and you can get more contact with your daughter and that they will listen to your concerns.

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